re: A music video in progress

Well, I've been commenting on other people's work since this forum opened so now I'm going to take my turn. This is a no-budget music video I've been doing with a singer-songwriter friend of mine. Nobody's getting paid and there's no budget (total cost up to now: $20 for tapes, $10 for gas and the time we spent). She wrote the song and sang; I produced the song and played the instruments, and I shot and edited the video on DV. And if you have a really quick eye, you can catch me appearing in the video.

There's still some more shooting to be done, but I wanted to get some comments on here as well, especially from colour-correction and effects-minded people because those are not my fortes.

You can be as honest as you want with comments, and about any aspect of the production -- shooting, editing, colours, effects, sound mix, compression quality, download time.

[www.derekmok.com]

CONTROL-click/right-click on the MP4 link to download and play.


www.derekmok.com

Hey Derek. First of all - lovely song. I liked it a lot and would have it in my iTunes playlist anyday. I really liked the black and white work, and the multiple colour setups - the overlay work was nice too.

As for crits - my main one is that it's too long. By about the four minute mark I was losing focus and getting bored with the repetitious visuals and lyrics. Yes, OK. Short attention span, I know. But I reckon you could take out at least one verse. Up to about four minutes I was into it.

The colour for the most part was nice. There is some stuff of people on the street that looks a bit red, some of the stuff in the car seems too grey - too low contrast. This may be what you were going for though. Colour is pretty subjective and pretty hard to judge on a quicktime on a LCD monitor.

I especially liked the transition from her face to the big blue sky at 2.30.
There's a bump in the visuals at 5.21 that was distracting.
Some of the realtime video looked more like video than the rest. I mean - the movement would look better with maybe one or two points of strobe - the stuff at 1.22 and 2.12. It wasn't often, but just occasionally.

But overall, nice work. Especially for a no budgeter.

I cant get it to open. Downloads as a mp4.txt file

Michael Horton
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> I cant get it to open. Downloads as a mp4.txt file

That's indeed weird. I had the same result downloading to a Tiger-equiped G5 at work to show to a colleague. But the file should play when you take the .txt extension off -- it should acquire a QuickTime icon when you do that.

> As for crits - my main one is that it's too long. By about the four minute mark I was losing
> focus and getting bored with the repetitious visuals and lyrics. Yes, OK. Short attention span,
> I know. But I reckon you could take out at least one verse. Up to about four minutes I was
> into it.

A point well taken. I did go for an "epic" song structure. The singer/songwriter herself, Clare, thought about taking a verse out as well.

Part of what we want to shoot next is something to break up all those driving and guitar-playing shots. A narrative component.

> There's a bump in the visuals at 5.21 that was distracting.

That was a surprise...I thought a bigger problem would have been the flash which interrupts the fade at 0:40. Still can't figure out the best way to solve it. The 5:21 bump is because I was superimposing but using a cut to get from one shot to another. I'll try a dissolve next time I tackle this.

> There is some stuff of people on the street that looks a bit red, some of the stuff in the car
> seems too grey - too low contrast.

No one can accuse me of being a great lighting guy... |} That's why I don't shoot often. I'm thinking of using the Lyric Shadow-Highlight to try to even out the driving shots where the interior of the car is pitch black but the outside is blinding. Or try the "overlay brightening" trick.

> Some of the realtime video looked more like video than the rest. I mean - the movement
> would look better with maybe one or two points of strobe - the stuff at 1.22 and 2.12. It
> wasn't often, but just occasionally.

I put Nattress 24p simulation over almost all the shots except the ones which already had strobing on it. Do you think I'd need to do those as well? I'm pretty sure I didn't leave any shots out but I'll take a look at the two points you mentioned. 2:12 -- you mean the sped-up shots of the cars, right?

Thanks for the feedback, Jude. Mike and the others, I'd love to hear what you think. Brutally honest is good -- I'm into making this thing better.


www.derekmok.com

No not the cars - I think it was just three or four instances, and they were all shots of Clare.

I'm actually reviewing a new set of plugs for FCP at the moment that have one called 'Pro window', which is great for adjusting only part of a shot. You can check it out here [www.thegradingsweet.com].

Cool! Liked the song. Kind of a country Aimee Mann. Was a bit long by maybe a minute. Liked the occasional and subtle red imagery. Bet you didn't even see that, did ya, but it is there. Can't comment on the color correction as I like the visuals. Some of the repetition distracts from the lyrics. Not so much during the chorus which you can get away with doing anything, but I need to listen to it one more time to hear her story. Got to figure out the Red car metaphor if there is one.



Michael Horton
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I agree with Jude, the song could end at the 4 minute mark, maybe add the ending chorus at that point.

I like the mixing up of visual looks, I think that is a pretty subjective area. We are all used to seeing a variety of styles within a video, so I feel you made things visually very interesting.

What is distracting to me is the bright, colorful look of the freeway, (her analogy to life?). I think it would add to what she is feeling in the song to see more of the gritty, filthy, confusing, anxiety producing aspects of driving L.A. freeways. The underpasses, graffiti, garbage, road rage, angry faces seen through glass as they drive by honking and flipping you off. The lonely looks of people who've broken down on the side. CHP pulling people over. The confusion of coming up to a series of signs pointing to different freeway interchanges going different directions when you've never gone this way before. Kind of like going through downtown L.A. for the first time.

That's my two cents. Very cool job. It's always fun to shoot and edit your own stuff. The caveat is, no one to blame for that out of focus angle that you were hoping to be the money shot. How many times have I said to myself, "You are such an idiot!"

Cameron Young

> What is distracting to me is the bright, colorful look of the freeway, (her analogy to life?). I
> think it would add to what she is feeling in the song to see more of the gritty, filthy,
> confusing, anxiety producing aspects of driving L.A. freeways.

I like your point, Cam, even though I have a different take on the song which also carried through when I did the musical arrangement and played the instruments. For one, I'm a big Matt Mahurin (Queensryche's "Silent Lucidity", U2's "With or Without You" fan and I do like that soft, dreamy vibe in certain music videos. (Now I just need his photography expertise.) Also, Red Hot Chili Peppers' "Under the Bridge" did something similar, a colourful and romanticized view on a song that's actually about copping drugs.

Secondly, when my friend Clare played me the song, I homed in more on a romantic and idealistic vision rather than a gritty interpretation. The chord progression (Fmaj7-C-G) is pretty open and chiming, like the more positive songs by The Cure, which is why I played all those arpeggiated 12-string electrics. Her lyrics and vocal delivery are also personal and hopeful rather than external and realistic (eg. Suzanne Vega vs. Tracy Chapman). So for me, it's more about the shining insides of a person's emotional, idealistic world, not about the grimy reality which intrudes on it. The "exit sign" in the song, for me, signifies that eventually there's a way out, even if the traffic jam's still on.

But I see where you're coming from and I appreciate alternate viewpoints. Now I wonder when and if I'll muster the willpower to kill some babies and chop the song down. I'm still in the "can't see it any other way" director's stage.


www.derekmok.com

Derek,

Well, this makes for a good horse race!

First off, I think you did an incredible job on the video, and am not dissing your choices. I hear the lyrics, and the imagery in my mind differs from yours. When I hear, "dirty freeway" "I don't know which exit to take" "nothing angelic" "muddy sky" " "I'm one of many this city has burned", it brings up the grit and grime, not bright and sunny. She, herself is talking about confusion, fear, and betrayal.

Now, even if you differ on this for the entire song, maybe change things up for just one section, think about emotional levels. Right now, it's all on one level. Introduce another level, and things show more depth.

A man walks across the street....pretty static. Add traffic with a toddler on the other side heading for the street and you have conflict ie: drama, and that makes things more interesting.

<<The "exit sign" in the song, for me, signifies that eventually there's a way out, even if the traffic jam's still on. >>

That is her conflict resolution, but, up until then, there is no conflict. She appears happy (judging by the supporting video) with the way things are.

But, then, that is just my opinion, and we all know that opinions are like ass_____, everyone's got one.

Cameron Young

> First off, I think you did an incredible job on the video, and am not dissing your choices.

Hey, I didn't think you were either. It'd be a real boring world if everybody had the exact same ideas. We're exchanging ideas in a respectful manner, which is what this forum is for.

> Now, even if you differ on this for the entire song, maybe change things up for just one
> section, think about emotional levels. Right now, it's all on one level. Introduce another level,
> and things show more depth.

There's something to that, but I also think music videos work on a slightly different level. The videos I mentioned -- "Silent Lucidity" and "With or Without You", or R.E.M.'s "Losing My Religion", Sinead O'Connor's "Nothing Compares 2 U", all classics -- also don't contain as much of what we'd consider narrative progression. The dynamics of the video depend on the dynamics of the song.

I do have plans to shoot a narrative component to the video, though. The driving/guitar playing do get repetitive at a certain point, especially since I'm trying to keep the epic structure of the song, a la Metallica's "One". That's why I built so many mood changes and dynamics into the music. So if I get more chances to cut away from this stuff, it would have a longer shelf life when I cut back to it.

> But, then, that is just my opinion, and we all know that opinions are like ass_____,
> everyone's got one.

And life would be, uh, pretty painful if we didn't have one!


www.derekmok.com